Growing up in a Midwest farm family, I can’t remember back before bacon. It was served with nearly every breakfast, as a quick lunch sandwich and as a wrap for dinner delicacies. Bacon was a pork staple and it was good.
Then came the extra bacon items. It was no longer just a side meat for eggs, the meaty foundation for a lettuce and tomato sandwich or the wrapping of a Filet Mignon. No. Now bacon was sold in jarred bits to sprinkle on salads. It lay across grilled beef and cheese on a toasted bun for an additional fifty cents. It added an extra bit of flavor and texture to ranch dressing dips. It could have stopped there, but it did not.
In the new millennium bacon took on a life outside it’s culinary usage and now, in 2011, it is the flavor of choice for almost everything.
Our pets can enjoy bacon flavored foods or chewy bacon strips.
Patrons of upscale taverns in several American cities can dive right into all-you-can-eat bacon nights, where the sumptuous, fried pork product is served right on the bar next to all but ignored counterparts, peanuts and pretzels. It’s salty to induce customers to drink more and, it seems, you can eat pounds of it without even realizing it.
But the buck, or in this case the hog, does not stop there.
There is bacon flavored vodka, which you can, presumably, mix with bacon flavored soda. Approaching an attractive person for the first time? Pop in a bacon flavored breath mint. Before venturing that first kiss, don’t forget your bacon flavored lip balm.
Enjoy movie night with the family even more by sharing a big bowl of bacon popcorn, covered, of course, with bacon butter and bacon salt. There’s bacon ice cream for dessert and don’t forget to use your bacon flavored tooth picks and brush, twice daily, with bacon toothpaste.
Bacon we can pop in a toaster, or buy, sealed and precooked of course, in cans in case of emergency is available as well as bacon we can squeeze onto sandwiches or spread on bread.
There are gumballs, jelly beans, gummis, drinking waters, baby formulas, rolls of toilet paper, personal lubricants, adhesive bandages, air fresheners, soaps, clothing items, colognes and more which all taste like, smell like or resemble America’s newest food fetish.
Like to eat bacon, but not fond of the flavor? Try strawberry or chocolate covered bacon!
Christmas gifts this year will, undoubtedly, include bacon neck ties, bikinis, rolling papers, lunch boxes, refrigerator magnets, hot sauce and postage stamps. Oh, and don’t forget the bacon candy canes for the kiddies.
The world, in general, and America, in particular has gone hog wild for bacon. Perhaps the religious ramifications of this phenomenon should be explored in depth. But, I’ll save that for another time. Right now, there’s a BLT calling my name.