“Love at first sight” is an issue that most of us contemplate when we meet someone with whom we have an immediate attraction, and feel a strong connection, as if we’ve known that person forever. One’s opinion on the existence of love at first sight is most likely dependent upon his/her own experiences. If you’ve never experienced it yourself, or don’t know anyone who has, you’re not likely to believe in it, but if you have experienced it, there’s no way to change your mind about the fact that it does happen.
Some believe that rush you feel when you’re falling for someone immediately could only be lust or infatuation. After all, when you first see someone, you are basing your thoughts and feelings about that person strictly on their looks, right? We could all agree that looks are at least somewhat important in choosing a mate. But what about chemistry? You know, that rush of chemicals our bodies release when we get around someone who “trips our trigger.” You don’t need to spend a lot of time with someone to feel chemistry. It’s practically immediate. According to scientific findings, a person’s scent is extremely important in physical attraction. And then there are the pheromones, which have been found to be extremely important in mate selection. They are chemicals our bodies emit, but are undetectible by the sense of smell. They are detected by the Vemeronasal Organ, which is in the nose, and their effect on us (especially women) is a strong sexual attraction.
How can you possibly fall in love the instant you see/meet someone? It’s utter nonsense. The human ape is programmed to procreate, to perpetuate the species. When eyes meet across a crowded room and that overpowering sensation of heat and need hits you in the stomach, that is lust, not love.
When your eyes meet for the first time and there’s a burning sensation deep inside in your chest that draws you together, that’s love. There’s an energy that clicks between the two of you, and you both know that you are soul mates for life.
Your body is telling your brain that the person you see is good mate material. Your genetics are yelling about sturdy children, good providers and possibly ‘isn’t it time you used up all those eggs/sperm that you have idling inside you?’ It is a sexual response to a primal urge and has absolutely nothing to do with love.
This is not a physical attraction that draws you together through lust, although the beauty or charisma that you see in each other could be one of the virtues that lures you together in the first place. Love is magnetism inside your hearts that connect you and aches until there’s only one heartbeat between you.
People are ashamed and afraid to admit that the reaction they have on seeing that attractive human being across the room is everything of lust and they dress it up in acceptable terms. They play the dating game and batten down those ‘nasty urges’, hiding them under a thin veneer of love and romance and sweet joy when what they actually want is to grab the person by the hand and head for the nearest available secluded corner.
That fact that you or even both of you are married is an obstacle that could permanently separate you from the person that would have made you ecstatically happy for life. You have responsibilities and dependents in your marriage that you can’t just destroy or walk out on.
Your hearts may be stirred and you may want to drop everything to be together but the timing is wrong. It may not be an option for you to be with this person that you met and they may never become your soul mate because of choices you have already made in life.
You may have missed the opportunity or perhaps the ideal timing to be together has not yet happened. You cannot erase the passion that has electrified your hearts or the sorrows from being parted, but you do have a responsibility to be faithful to what you have already committed yourself to.
Love is very real and will endure all things, forgive all things and live through all things. When we choose our marriage partner, we need to be sure that this is our soul mate for life and not the result of physical passion.